Hello May

1. The previous month has taught me that, consistency is what gets us the fruits we desire to see, and so does patience. 

I've also learnt that you keep pushing even if it hurts. When it comes to leadership there are so many challenges. And at times you're tempted to give up. But you are required to show up and push through because it's about next person and not you.

It's hard to fulfil a vision when you are not united. And often, if the leader does not take seriously the advice of his team, there'll be no progress. I'm learning that a leader should never be a self-centered man / woman. 

A church that that doesn't prioritize it's children is a danger zone. Kids lack. Resources aren't there and it hurts working in such an institution. I envision that one day I'll be part of a church that will recognize its duty towards the training of its children and having the right facilities. It's been so long though. And my heart is broken regarding this matter.

2. In all the challenges I face, I'm trusting God only. I know He's the One who has the power to bring every desire to reality; but most importantly I'm learning to accept that all is in God's hands.

I'm also learning that you push even when every circumstances are against you. 

I hope by the end of the year, I'll be able to speak openly about this for a full perspective.

I'm also learning to come out of my cocoon. If it were up to me, I'd never stand in front of an audience, but there are things that need that i.e being a departmental leader and other duties. But I am learning it's not about me but the leader - God.

I've also learnt that life happens. Folks may desire to support us but things come up and they need to attend such so the safe outlook is to leave it on God's hand and pray for an accepting heart. 

Remember your why. If your why is for God then even if the support is not reciprocated you'll be all right. There are people who desire support from others but will never reciprocate. You will dedicate time and resources but when you are in need of their presence, they'll run far. It hurts honestly. But mortals do err.

3. I'm grateful for God's sustaining power over my life, for new desires and strength to push, even in the midst of disappointments. 

I'm grateful for the Word of God which is life and power, its guidance and hope-filled messages. 

I'm grateful for my family  and other loved ones who are a support system in my life.

I'm thankful for being in a better place as compared to the previous years.

I'm grateful for the success of our Autism Awareness and Acceptance Day which took place at church. It was a highlight for us as the church and for us to have it done during Divine Service was amazing. I'm  praying for more talks around it - as the presenter mentioned how it affect families. I also remember observing an interaction between a girl with an autistic sister and I found myself wondering how her life has changed since having her sister.

4. God has come through for me in so many ways. But one that stands out is Him giving me strength to face each day even though I might be discouraged or hurting. 

I'm grateful for the protection He gives and the provision - spiritually, physical, mentally etc.

5. I'd love to serve my family more. Be more present. Be intentional about our spirituality as a family (pray more and read more books as a family).

I'd like to start a particular project where I'm staying, I  just need space to run it. 

I'd like to teach my nieces more Bible stories  when they come and visit. I'm excited and I even bought them a Bible story book (but in all truth, I love children's stories).

I'd  also like to be a safe space / love more. The world is cruel enough. I don't want to add. 

And most importantly I'd like to work on myself. The more God helps me, the better of a person I may be.