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Reflection: 31 /12

 Few years ago, I agreed to enter into a courtship with my friend 😊 and looking back, I realize how much I've grown and how we've both become better individuals. There are so many lessons, but a few stand out:

1. Continue to maintain a strong relationship with God: that is the strongest foundation for your relationship. Your sense of security and direction is centered on God, not your partner.

2. Ask questions when you don't understand, or you end up assuming. Communicate your expectations, discomforts, fears or whatever you are going through pertaining the relationship. I tend to want to lean inward and seek space ; but in essence this adds no value to the relationship. 

3. Pray for your partner.

4. Serve each other.

5. Don't hurry love. Intimacy takes time. Friendship takes time. Don't panic. You will eventually get to a place where you are friends and in sync with each other. It takes time, trust, vulnerability and intention.

6. Don't discuss your issues with outsiders unless a third party is needed. Preferably a trusted source. But learn to resolve issues yourselves. 

7. Affirm each other and take time to reflect.

8. Love your partner in their love language. My person knows how much I love quality time so he always makes sure to call / text (I do too 😉). Being in a LDR  can be tough so you really need to make time. 

9. Have friends and hobbies outside of your relationship.

10. Mould your relationship into what you'd like it to be. Remember that no relationship looks alike. Don't let external factors influence you. Define what works for you, and limit voices regarding what you should do in the relationship. Take counsel, but let godly principles guide you.

11. Ask God for discernment. Ask him to open your eyes regarding red flags. If they are not there, continue in faith. 

12. Pray for direction. Pray for power to honour God. 


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